Gone are the days when funerals meant mourners wore dark colours, sang hymns and were led by a religious official in a place of worship. Today, funerals are becoming a more personal affair, with the deceased having a much bigger say in what they want to happen at their funeral before they die.  

Tradition isn’t for everyone. Whether you’re planning your own funeral or organising a ceremony for someone you love, here are some ways you can make it more personal to reflect the life that was lived.  

Ask mourners to wear bright colours 

One of the most common ways to personalise a funeral is to ask mourners to wear bright colours. Bright colours are typically seen as a celebration of life, bringing comfort to those who are mourning and feeling anxious about the ceremony. 

According to a study by YouGov in 2016, only 22% of people see black funeral attire as a requirement at funerals, with a further 29% believing any colour is acceptable. You may want to specify a specific shade – perhaps your loved one’s favourite colour. Or you could even suggest that mourners wear the colours of the football team your loved one supported in life. Sometimes ‘anything but black’ is enough of a steer to help people decide what to wear.  

One of our Park Managers shared this heart-warming story with us about one of the funerals held in their Park: 

“One that sticks out for me at Chiltern is a lady who had a service and burial. She was super flamboyant and extremely colourful in all aspects of her life – from how she dressed to the colour of her hair. All the guests were dressed in many different colours. Her daughter also wanted to do something special and found a beautiful multi-coloured horse and carriage to take her mum to her final resting place. It was such a beautiful service, and it was an honour to help the family.” 

Choose a unique coffin  

You can make a coffin as unique as you’d like it to be. From bright colours and bespoke themes to prints and sporting crests, there’s no end to the options available to you.  

There are picture coffins to consider, too. These are coffins adorned with a particular picture that takes inspiration from the deceased’s favourite places, hobbies, or sports. You can even have their favourite photograph printed onto the coffin, serving as a celebration of their life long after they’re gone.  

Create a unique floral display 

Celebrate your loved one’s passions by creating a unique floral display. You could create an open book floral arrangement as a tribute to a bookworm, or have the flowers arranged as an instrument to celebrate a musician. If your loved one was a keen gardener, why not include their favourite flowers and plants from their own garden?  

No idea is too difficult for the right florist. Talk to a local funeral florist about your ideas, and they’ll find a way to bring them to life.  

Have a civil ceremony led by a celebrant or humanist 

Funerals led by a celebrant or humanist are now very popular. Humanist ceremonies tend to be non-religious, which is one of the main reasons why people choose to have one. Civil celebrants tailor the service entirely to the deceased’s wishes, allowing them to have as much or as little religious content as they like. Both types of ceremony can be spiritual and are fully flexible to represent the life you or your loved one lived.  

Use alternative transport to a hearse 

A traditional hearse is most widely used to carry a coffin to a funeral, but there are several companies in the UK – like Morton’s Funeral Hire , TCribb and Bennetts Funeral Directors – that specialise in transforming unique modes of transport into hearses with enough space to hold a coffin. Instead of a classic hearse, you could choose a: 

You could even choose a traditional horse-drawn glass hearse, giving your loved one the magical send-off they deserve. Speak to your local funeral director to discuss your requirements in detail and see what’s possible.

Add personal finishing touches 

Here are some finishing touches you might want to consider to make a funeral more personal:  

You could also decorate the Service Hall with things special to your loved one – like this family did at one of our Parks: 

“We had a burial service for a lady in her 90s who was well known in Grayshott village for cycling around on her tricycle and being very active in the area. She was also a great quilter, and her family brought all her quilts and bunting which we used to decorate the hall. Her famous tricycle also played a part! Her service was a wonderful celebration of her life and the family were very pleased that it was so personal and special.” 

If you’d like to arrange a more personal funeral for yourself or a loved one, speak to a friendly and knowledgeable member of the GreenAcres team and we’ll do everything we can to accommodate your wishes.  

funeral planning

It may seem strange to be thinking about your own death and what happens afterwards. But planning how – and where – you’d like to be remembered is part of your legacy. When the time comes, it will give your family peace of mind to know they’re carrying out your wishes. 

There are several components to end-of-life planning, some of which may help you and those close to you prepare. To help make this daunting task feel a little easier, we’ve got some tips on how to get things in order before it’s too late.  

Why plan ahead?  

Getting advice about later life planning is important, as it can help make things feel much easier later down the line. Planning ahead can also take the pressure off your family and significantly reduce the cost of your funeral.  

We understand that planning for your death ahead of time can feel overwhelming. If you need additional support, Life Ledger offers a free, easy-to-use service that allows families to notify every business connected to the deceased from a single place. Life Ledger can help individuals and families before they experience a bereavement with simple and easy end-of-life planning.  

Here are the other main things you should think about before dipping your toe into funeral planning. 

Ensure you have an up-to-date will 

Having an up-to-date will written by a solicitor is vital in ensuring your wishes are respected and followed. A legitimate will also free your family from the burden of difficult decisions and legal complications.  

If you don’t yet have one or are unsure of where to start, March is Free Wills Month. Supported by a group of well-respected charities, Free Wills Month offers anyone aged 55 and over the opportunity to have a simple will written or updated free of charge by participating solicitors across England, Scotland, and Wales.   

To get involved, simply enter your details on the Free Wills Month website to find participating solicitors near you.  

Appoint an individual with durable power of attorney

A durable power of attorney is an important legal document that gives another person the right to make decisions about your finances, health and welfare should you become incapacitated. Choosing someone you trust, such as a friend or loved one, negates the need for costly and stressful court action should the worst happen. This is especially important if you’re unwell or suffering from a long-term or terminal illness.  

If you need help in coping with a terminal illness, Hospice UK’s Dying Matters Campaign is committed to creating an open culture in which we’re comfortable about talking death, dying and bereavement. Visit the website for helpful resources and more information about how the charity can support you. 

Specify preferences for your funeral, burial, or cremation

Everyone deserves to have their wishes met when the time comes. Regardless of your spiritual or religious beliefs, choosing whether you’d like a funeral, burial or cremation is a big decision to make. However, thinking about it as early as possible helps take the stress away from your loved ones during a difficult time. Ultimately, the decision is up to you, but talking through your options with your loved ones will make the choice much easier. 

burial planning

We understand that this step can be the hardest of all. That’s why our friendly team of experts are here to help at every step, empowering you to make the right choices. 

Select a resting place

Most of us believe that a final resting place is all about the deceased. It’s easy to ignore what will happen after you die – and many of us don’t consider how difficult the decisions are for the loved ones left behind. But choosing your final resting place before the time comes can bring you and your family a sense of peace before you pass.  

When thinking about where you’d like your final resting place to be, GreenAcres is not only a place where your loved ones can reflect on your life, but a beautiful location to meet, go for a walk, and make connections that can last a lifetime.  

resting place after death

You can choose where you want to rest from a variety of settings, from peaceful sustainably managed woodlands and stunning wildflower meadows to relaxing, well-cared-for parkland. 

Consider the environmental impact of your funeral

Whatever your wishes, you may want to consider having a sustainable funeral to minimise your impact on the environment. At GreenAcres, we take care to maintain our Parks so that your loved ones can enjoy them for years to come. 

We’ve also implemented a range of eco and conservation policies to protect the landscape (such as plastic free). Additionally, we encourage the use of natural coffin materials, such as bamboo, cardboard, willow and banana leaf, wherever possible. You can even choose to have no coffin at all! 

Explore themes, music, colours that you may wish your life to be celebrated 

A funeral or memorial service is a unique way to celebrate the life you lived. While traditional funeral etiquette suggests that mourners should wear black, you might want to choose more vibrant colours instead to more accurately represent your life. You may also wish to select a theme that reflects your hobbies, interests, or culture.  

Talk to your loved ones about your wishes, as they can help you plan the perfect send-off. They can also offer ideas that you may not have considered before. In fact, many families tell us that the conversation they’d been dreading turned into laughter and smiles. 

Co-op Funeralcare has pulled together a list of the nation’s most popular farewell songs – and the top five may surprise you! Take a look to see if your favourite’s on the list. 

Top of the (funeral) Pops include: 

1 You’ll Never Walk Alone Gerry and The Pacemakers
2 My Way Frank Sinatra
3 Always Look On The Bright Side of Life Eric Idle
4 Simply The Best Tina Turner
5 Supermarket Flowers Ed Sheeran

 

We’re here to help you every step of the way. Come and speak to our knowledgeable team to learn more about the options available to you for planning for the future. You may also benefit from attending one of our Later Life Planning Seminars run at many of our Parks throughout the year. See our website for more information.  

 

Nothing can prepare you for how you might feel when someone close to you dies, whether it’s expected or not. It can feel overwhelming, devastating and strange, all at the same time. There’s lots to organise. And it can be difficult to know where to start.

We don’t tend to talk much about death, burial or the kind of funeral you might want. But it’s worth remembering that writing down your own wishes now can take stress and worry away from the people you love most when it’s their turn to make the arrangements.

Some people find comfort in the practical tasks they need to carry out. Of course, it helps if someone has planned ahead and left details of what they’d like, including where they’d like to be buried. If not, and if you haven’t arranged a burial before, here’s a guide to what you need to know.

  • standing at funeral of her loved one

What to do next

If your loved one dies in a care home or hospital, there should be someone to guide you through what to do next and how to register the death. This involves visiting the nearest Registry Office to where the person has died, taking along the medical certificate of death that’s been signed by a doctor. The Registrar will give you a green form that means a burial can go ahead. You will need to hand this to the Funeral Director you’ve chosen, if you have decided to use one, and not everyone does. You’ll also need to ask for extra copies of the death certificate to settle other affairs such as bank accounts. You’ll need to pay for the first and any additional copies of this certificate.

The Funeral Director is your friend

You might not have met before, but your Funeral Director is the expert who can advise you about all aspects of the funeral and burial. If you don’t feel comfortable about going to their office, most will be happy to come and see you at home, or speak by phone, which feel more relaxed.

At your first meeting, there will be lots of questions. Take your time and don’t feel under pressure to agree to anything you’re not happy about. There shouldn’t be any pressure, for example, about choosing the coffin, car or flowers. And if you at anytime feel that the Funeral Director you have chosen is not suitable for your needs, or they aren’t listening to what you want, you have the option to choose a different one. You are well within your rights to do this. This relationship, although a short one, is going to be important over the next few weeks.

If your loved one hasn’t left any directions, you’ll need to make the decisions about whether you want a funeral service and, if you do, where it will be held. The Funeral Director will also discuss whether the body is to be embalmed, ask where your loved one is to be buried (this may also affect the type of coffin that’s permitted), and whether you’ve thought about what might be placed on top of the coffin. And you’ll also need to discuss what clothes you’d like your loved one to be buried in and whether any personal items are to be buried with them (again, the type of burial site may affect which items can be included).

The funeral service

You might already have a good idea of whether you’re going to have a service and, if so, where it will be, who will lead it and who should deliver the eulogy. Or you may not. You’ll need to find time to discuss these details with family or friends and work with your Funeral Director to create an Order of Service. Don’t underestimate how difficult it can be to deliver a eulogy if you’re a close relative or friend of the person who has died. It’s one of the most challenging tasks you could take on at such an emotional time. If you are not used to public speaking and prefer not to deliver this your friends and family will understand.

Sometimes, a person’s religious faith affects how soon after death the funeral needs to take place. But in many cases, funerals take place over a week afterwards, to give people who may live further away time to plan their travel.

Funeral services are usually held before the body is buried, while memorial services can be arranged a while later. In some service halls, the ceremony can be recorded and live-streamed to mourners who aren’t able to attend. And some people choose a graveside service at the burial site instead of a service hall.

 

Covid-19 restrictions

Currently, there are some restrictions that affect funeral arrangements. Your Funeral Director will be able to advise you about the latest rules. Alternatively you can visit Gov.uk website for the most recent updates.

 

Choosing a burial plot

If your loved one hasn’t left a note of their wishes, you’ll need to consider not only where they should be buried, but any restrictions that apply to the cemetery, including the type of coffin that can be used. In a traditional graveyard, you can choose pretty much any type of coffin or casket (including metal caskets) you wish, and the site can be marked with a headstone, mausoleum or burial vault.

Nowadays, many people are choosing more environmentally friendly burials, and these come with some restrictions. In most sites, a simple shroud can be used instead of a coffin and there are some restrictions on the type of coffin that can be used. For example, in a natural burial site, the coffin should be made of biodegradable materials, without metal handles, and there should be no other materials in the coffin that don’t break down naturally. Some woodland burial sites, such as GreenAcres parks, have slightly different/flexible criteria that allow any type of coffin with the exception of zinc lined and metal caskets in their woodland. However, their parklands do allow metal caskets to be interred, but your Funeral Director and the cemetery will be able to advise you about these.

 

Finding the right way to remember

Modern cemeteries are designed to be a place for the living. That means they’re spaces where people want to meet, spend time, walk and reflect on a loved one.

Many private cemeteries offer a choice of burial site so that traditional areas can accommodate a headstone or mausoleum, whereas woodland areas might have more discreet memorials, simple wooden posts or ‘living memorials’ such as trees that will outlast those who chose them. Or there’s the option of having an unmarked grave that, over time, becomes an integral part of the surrounding natural environment.

In a contemporary burial site like GreenAcres, it’s really up to you. You can consider an oak memorial post or memorial plaque or even a ‘living memorial’ like a tree or a natural habitat for wildlife such as a bird box.

 

Staying together

Sometimes a couple wish to stay together not only in life but also after they’ve died. Finding a private garden or a woodland glade where your loved one can be buried, but that also leaves space for a partner to follow, is a popular choice.

Marked burial plots, with double-depth graves, at GreenAcres mean that a second person can be laid to rest with their loved one in the future.

In some areas of GreenAcres parks, there is also an option to reserve several spaces in private gardens and woodland glades, meaning families and friends can be buried close together.

 

How can you safeguard a burial plot for the future?

Some organisations give you the option of buying a long lease on a burial plot. This means it’s protected for future generations, who won’t have to bear the financial burden of renewing the lease or the guilt if they don’t. Private cemeteries like GreenAcres offer the flexibility of choosing from a variety of lease periods from 25 years to the life of the park.

 

What makes modern burials different?

For a growing number of people, the focus is on sustainability, biodiversity, quality of service and choice.

At GreenAcres, you can choose a burial plot in one of the six beautiful parks, located in different parts of the country. Depending on which of the parks you select, there’s a choice of woodland, meadows and lawns within acres of protected parkland.

 

Where can I go for more information?

Funeral Guide gives you step-by-step information on what to do when someone dies.

Tell Us Once is a service that enables you to report a death to most government organisations in one go.

 

Find out more about organising a burial at GreenAcres.